Today is a very hard day for me. Evan and I should be welcoming our first miracle baby into this world but instead I’m still grieving our loss. I’ve been doing a lot better as far as dealing with the situation these past few months, but today is just hard. It hurts to look at the calendar because I had written “Baby’s due date” across today’s date. I tried to cover it up but I know it’s still there. I broke down in the car today as I drove home from the gym. I miss my baby even though I didn’t get to meet him or her. I miss being pregnant. I miss feeling like I’m waiting to give Evan the best present I could ever give him. Even though I will never forget about our first baby, I can’t help but think about what the future holds for us. Truthfully, I thought we would be pregnant again by now. It’s been over 6 months since our loss but still nothing. I hope our angel baby has a talk with God and lets him know that we’re ready for another chance.