Monthly Archives: June 2012

Graduation, A Mini-Vacation, and Some Other News

I am really slacking on the blog posts lately. I think it’s a combination of no motivation and still feeling depressed about our IVF cycle. Lots of things have happened in the past two weeks – I finally graduated with my Master’s degree and E and I went on a mini-vacation to his family’s lake house for three days. While we were away, we came to a big and important decision, but more on that later.

First off – graduation.

I have been working towards my teaching certification in elementary education ever since we were stationed in Georgia in 2008. Finally my hard work has paid off and I finally have my degree and am working on completing my paperwork to be officially certified to teach K-6. I’m happy to report that I graduated with a 4.0 and couldn’t be prouder of my accomplishments.

Last Friday morning, E, my parents, and I headed down to the city to attend a brunch hosted by the School of Education. I wish I could have taken some pictures of all of the food because the spread was amazing – french toast, eggs, bagels, pancakes, bacon, hash browns, and so much more. We all took advantage of the free food since we all knew that it was going to be a very long day. After the brunch, we took a walk around the campus since I never actually took classes there. We picked up some free gifts being given out to the online students and took some pictures. I was instructed to report to the gym by 12:30, so off I went. The ceremony didn’t start until 1:30, but thankfully I found some girls I had classes with and we chatted while we waited. It was so nice to actually put some faces to the names that I had seen over the past year and a half.

At 1:30, we started the procession into the main part of the gym. Let me tell you – the place was packed! It was hot and crowded but I was still excited. The ceremony moved quickly but it took over 2 hours for all of the names to be called. I’m happy to report that I did NOT trip (I can’t say the same for my high school and undergraduate graduations).

After the graduation ceremony, we headed back to my parents’ house for a party for E and I (E also graduated with his Master’s degree in Intelligence Studies – Go E). My aunts and uncles came as well as my best friend and another great friend from high school. I loved having time to sit around, catch up with friends, and eat some darn good cake.

The next day, E headed back downtown to run a marathon. I decided to head down later in the day because there was no way I was standing around in the heat for over 3 hours. E finished the race in 3 hours and 42 minutes and received a third place award within his age group. This race was in preparation for an triathlon that he will be participating in in a few short months (crazy, crazy man).

On Sunday, we said adios to the parents and headed up to E’s family’s lake house. We spent the next three days canoeing, hiking, running, reading, and relaxing. It was nice to step away from the laptop and homework and just focus on relaxing. The dogs had a great time being outside for a majority of the day and exploring the water and the dirt roads.

While we were hanging out, we discussed our next steps in regards to expanding our family. We will still proceed with our FET in mid-August; however, we are now actively pursuing adoption. This option was always on the back burner, but it’s now becoming our new reality. We agreed awhile back that we would only be doing one fresh IVF cycle and then go forward with FET if we were so lucky to have any embryos to freeze (we have 6).

We want to get the ball rolling because I’m not very confident that FET will be successful and because we will be moving in less than a year. We’re both very excited and currently we’re looking at agencies. If anyone has any suggestions or advice for a military family pursuing domestic infant adoption, please, please leave a comment or shoot me an email. The process is a bit overwhelming, but we are looking forward to what the future holds for us and for our family.

Feeling Lost

The title says it all – I’m feeling lost. It’s been about 3 weeks since we found out that IVF #1 didn’t work and I’m still trying to deal with the emotional side effects of yet another failure. Jealously is rearing it’s ugly head again. A few women who I follow on Twitter and did IVF/FET when I did, were lucky enough to hop off the infertility roller coaster and onto the pregnancy one. I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I often think – Why not me? Why is not my turn? Haven’t E and I been through enough? I’m so happy that these women have finally found success after their own long and personal struggles, but it’s still hard to deal with. I feel like I’m being left behind and there are less and less women to relate to. 
I’m struggling with my body image. Ever since we found out that IVF didn’t work, I’ve been back to my normal exercise routine and tracking my calories. I’m ashamed to say that I put on about 9 pounds between my last IUI and IVF and desperately want to lose it. Despite all of my efforts, the scale has yet to budge. The goal is to be back to my “normal” weight by the time FET rolls around in August. Guess I need to step it up a bit and just keep moving. 
FET #1 – the final issue I’m struggling with. If it were up to me, FET would be happening this month. Unfortunately, I have no control over the timeline – we’re at the mercy of the military hospital. I want to get things moving and get closer to having our baby. 
I hope these negative feelings go away soon – they probably won’t – but I want them to. 

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In

I feel like I haven’t participated in a MilSpouse Fill-In in quite some time. School is wrapping up (only 2 more days of student teaching), so I’ll have some more time to blog over the summer. Head over to Wife of a Sailor’s blog to learn more about the Fill-In and to link up your blog.

1. What’s one thing in the past month you would have changed?

I wish we could go back and change the negative outcome of IVF #1 to a positive one. I’m still very upset and bitter about the failure and am having a huge pity party over here.

2. What was your favorite thing that happened in May?

Wrapping up my student teaching experience with my last observation yesterday morning. I can’t believe this experience is almost over and that I will have my master’s degree in just a few weeks.

3. June includes the first day of summer…. what are your plans for the summer?

Trying to find a teaching job for the fall, working out to lose this IVF weight, going to my graduation ceremony in Philly, taking a mini-trip to E’s family’s lake house, and most importantly, FET in August.

4. Do you use the services on base (gym, financial planning, family services, daycare)? And if so, what’s your favorite one? 

The only service I have used is the gym, which would be my favorite one even if I used any other service. I love all of the free (for now) fitness classes that are offered and am looking forward to getting back into my daily routine on Wednesday. Love spin and muscles classes!

5. What are you looking forward to in June?

Graduation and spending some quality time with E and the pups at the lake.